Our Happy Ending

I have personally emailed a lot of the people who we have met through this blog over the last two years of this journey. But I know I missed some of you, and I want everyone to know that even though our journey did not take us where we expected, we ended up where we were supposed to be!

Instead of renewing our approval to adopt in Mexico, we decided to convert our paperwork to adopt domestically. It all happened incredibly fast. We are happy to announce that we became parents! We have a beautiful daughter, and we are completely treasuring being parents.

So those of you still on your adoption journey, follow your heart. Eventually you will find your child!

Change in Plans

Just a few days after the previous posting, we were contacted by the DIF of the state with our dossier. They had a proposal of two options for us to consider, a sibling group or a single child. We were so excited! However, we were not told very much information about either option. We asked for more information. We were not able to get the information we needed nor a referral. It just did not feel right to us, so we decided not to proceed. A formal referral is a necessary component before traveling to meet any children, and somehow it just did not come together. So, we could not risk continuing. A referral is required by international law, and we needed to make sure all laws were followed.

On top of that, Mexico is trying to implement a new system for international adoptions. We are not sure how it is going to work. In addition to being accredited by the Hague, it was not clear to us whether American agencies also need to have Mexico national accreditation and/or accreditation in each of the individual states. The state that had our dossier decided they wanted us to use an agency that was accredited by Mexico and ours wasn't. We still aren't sure what type of accreditation they were asking for. We decided not to try to switch states, because there is still a lot of uncertainty as to the new direction of international adoptions from Mexico.

It was all very complicated and confusing. The rules, requirements and processes at the state and national levels keep changing. We went through way more than I am saying publicly on this blog. We have decided that we will not renew our approval to adopt in Mexico. We are at peace with this decision.

Time to Renew

The photo above really has nothing to do with this entry whatsoever. It's just
bright and colorful, and I need that right now! I love papaya. And I appreciate
how in Mexico you get lime with just about everything. I love limes too. OK, now
to get to topic.

Our I-800a is going to expire soon. We will need to renew it since we haven't received a referral yet. I have had this in the back of mind nagging me. And now I know why. There's more to it than just sending in the simple looking form, Supplement 3.

Apparently we need to have a home visit by our homestudy social worker, and the social worker needs to verify that everything is still the same as the original homestudy states. If anything has changed in our circumstances, it must be stated in a report. If everything is the same, the social worker still needs to write a report saying that nothing has changed.

We know our social worker will be sending for new clearances from the places we have lived in the last five years. We've only lived in one location these last five years, so that part is at least not complicated. We probably need other things too like new medical exams. We're getting clarity bit by bit.

So there is a bit of a panic here as we are try to figure out what we need to gather before the deadline, so our approval doesn't expire.

A New Year

Will 2010 be the year? This isn't the first New Year's where I have had that same thought. I know to not take it for granted. Yet we are still hopeful.

We have been on the waiting list for over seven months for siblings aged seven and younger. But recently we opened up the possibility of a single child. Now if a single child becomes available that would make a great fit with us, the DIF will be able to consider us. Right now it's anyone's guess! So, we will see how much longer we will wait.

A lot has changed since we started planning to adopt. We have gone from hoping for a baby to being open to older siblings to being open to whatever child or children the DIF will propose to us. Mexico isn't even the first plan we had for adoption. Then after deciding on Mexico, we thought we were going to submit to one certain state there, but then ended up deciding to submit to another. And things continue to change!

One thing has remained the same. Our goal. To become parents. What matters is making the most of the time we have with our child or children once we become a family. We have been reminded by others who have adopted before us, no matter when you meet your child or how old the child is when you meet him or her, more than likely they will be your sons or daughters for many more years than the years you missed with them.

So, we are taking it one day at a time, seeing what opportunities present themselves, and are trying to remain open. And we wonder what surprises 2010 will bring.